I have a personal dilemma. I am sat on an invite to be a speaker at an event next year. It involves sharing the stage with other "notables" of the truth and freedom movement.
Part of me has wanted to just become a "digital recluse" and stay away from all public speaking. I am moderately traumatised from the last few years and the nonstop stress involved, and some days I feel paralysingly anxious and low energy as a result. Having a commitment to appear in public looms over me, especially as the time gets near. I don't relish the attention of the masses, or endless correspondence. It's not ideal for my health.
That said, I used to do this kind of presenting for a living, and I am fairly good at it, too. Part of me says go fight the good fight, even if you are a wounded warrior. I kind of played for all the intellectual chips with Q — and won. I have something to say, and a story to tell, which people need to hear. I am not responsible for the others I share a stage with.
i don’t begin to put myself in your shoes but you’ve just described in part what we all struggle with being in the flesh vs the will of the spirit. The flesh never wants to be uncomfortable but the spirit is your true self pushing you to fear not for GOD is with you. It is the gift you have been given! 🙏🏻 💜