A learning for me… large cities are artificial environments and largely enemy territory with unhealthy vibes and dangerous traps. I get spiritually sick in the city; I heal around nature. The urban buzz is an addictive drug that no longer serves me. The smaller towns and cities with medieval centres are OK. At this point the fight is for wellness of self rather than awakening of others.
You are in self preservation mode. or take a look at the Hero's Journey...
