The enemy has a lot of profitable addictions on offer… sugar, drugs, alcohol, prostitution, gambling. I doubt any of us are really emancipated as long as we feed them. I have been suffering because I keep waiting for something to happen in the outside world to reconcile relationships and ease making a living. But the primary battlefront is control over my own desires.

Everything I might have overcome in the world is easy in comparison. It is the movable line where real losses and gains happen, and lives do get lost, and it is a pervasive war. Not much point in the military saving the world from the bioweapon poison if we insist on killing ourselves with all the others pushed at us.

Am belatedly realising that my work on the Great Awakening amounts to little versus breaking my own addictions, bringing the hidden struggle to light. Cannot advocate for righteousness while being captive to the temptations that ease the pain of living in a psychotic disintegrating matrix world.

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