If anyone asks what 2018-22 were like, it felt as if you had a worn out civilisation in hospice care, but the palliative doses were never quite enough to tip it over the edge, so you waited and waited for the inevitable.

It's been a very long state of limbo. I don't know that I will ever be able to live in this world the way I used to. Will finally be going back to the office next week after 2+ years of being banned for the crime of being non-vaxxed and frankly I am afraid I won't be able to have the same relationship with people that were once my friends. Now we share a world but not really, I feel like an alien.
I know we will never be able to go back and quite frankly I feel I have earned who and what I am. I wouldn't trade one minute or one fight but I mourn that I will probably never live the happy life I 'thought' I had. At least not in a way I can imagine yet.