Other people get to put masks on and play characters; no doubt there is real risk in being an actor going up against evil, and witness protection is a hard life. That said, I am not playing a character, I am Martin of the family Geddes, and I am "out there" in public under my only identity. Named, not anonymous.

There are no regrets, and many rewards. It is uncomfortable, as you're held to every word you utter, no matter how foolish at the time. That there may be later worldly rewards for erudition or foresight don't make it easier in the moment. My former professional life is gone. My family life was affected.

This war is "continuous microtrauma" rather than "sporadic supertrauma". It adds up, and I get weighed down by the scars. Being one of the faces of the movement brings constant little hostilities — like online harassment via fake reports of death, or people with mental health issues coming for you.

Am looking forward to a transformative event. It is time.