I can confess to having driven myself a bit nuts by worrying about whether I can cope with seeing the anguish of the poisoned and betrayed. I never watch horror movies (even Lassie getting lost was upsetting), yet we live inside of one. Have been living βon edgeβ for several years, and sometimes fear does get the better of you. We are a very long way from the early awakening where you could still be intelectual and aloof, hoping for a swift resolution because you were clueless about the scale and scope of the problem. In the end, I simply have to be functional for the sake of my daughters, who will someday see that I was besmirched, and was the only one who fought to protect them. Them being put into enemy hands by the rest of the family and being made to watch has drained me. The adults who mocked and made poor choices get care if I have spare energy only.
I am with you. π I want my Children to know I could not remain silent. They trusted their life without critical thought and now I must surrender to their choices. It is time to work on me and release the negative anything in my life. LOVE is the key Martin. π