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I no longer believe in God because I fear damnation.
At one time that may have been the case but it is not so now.
I believe in God because through my long years I have tried to be a good man and time and time again I have failed. I have seen my deeds done with the best intentions turn into acts of hate and destruction.
I do not have the ability to become the man I truly wish to be, the man who longs for God and walks the righteous path. I am not that man, not now, not ever. It is only through God and with his help that I can ever hope to be anything close. This is the reason I believe in God.
I know that I would not want to be something better if there were not already something better to show me the way.
I seek forgiveness and knowledge because I want to be better with every fiber of my being. But I can not alone.
To know I am loved when I find myself unworthy of it is Godly.
This is why I believe.
May the Lord help us all become righteous.
I needed to hear this right now at this exact moment. James, I feel the same way. I pray every night to be a better person, get up the next morning and try, but still go to bed frustrated that I cannot be that Godly person. I see friends that just project the Holy Spirit in their every word and action and I wonder why I can't be that person. I found you for a reason, I keep trying to figure out how I got here, I know it was originally through Twitter before everyone got booted, but as Q always says, there are no coincidences! Thank you for your honesty. I believe in God with all my heart, I have seen Him guide me through some miraculous stuff and still I fall short of His glory everyday. Just me, a human, but I know God love me!